Self-Care Routines For Busy African Women
Peculiar to many African women is a masking of their weaknesses and watching out for every other person but themselves. In my observation, there comes a time when everything seems to come to a stand still, maybe they fall sick, they loose out on friendships and genuine connections, they loose out on an opportunity, they feel cheated because they gave everyone their all except themselves.
So, If you’re an African woman, it’s a good time adjust your seats and pay attention. You cannot keep pouring without filling up, if you do that, one day you’d have poured all and what is left is nothing. It’s scary conclusion but equally a very true and unescapable one.
As a busy African woman, you may have what is called the “saviour’s complex”, that thing in you that keeps telling you that you’re everyone’s saviour, that they all can’t survive without you, may be it’s your job, your business, your family, your siblings, your children, your spouse, your friends. No one goes on in that manner and doesn’t end up wishing that they had paid more attention to themselves.
I love what Audre Lorde said “Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare.”
The myth that Black/African women can continue tirelessly working while neglecting their own needs is unsafe for our mental, emotional, and physical health. It’s essential to remember that self-care is not selfish; it’s a vital aspect of maintaining your physical and mental well-being.
In this article, we’ll explore 9 valuable self-care routines to embrace as a busy African woman in order to show up as your best self, recharge your batteries, and live a more fulfilling life.
1. Prioritize Sleep
Ensure you get enough rest. Create a relaxing bedtime routine and aim for 7-8 hours of sleep and make sure to off all screens at least an hour to bedtime.
2. Healthy Eating
Prepare balanced meals with plenty of vegetables, fruits, and lean proteins. Bulk buying and Meal prepping on weekends can save time during the week.
3. Stay active
As a busy woman , by the nature of your job, you might want to slip into a sedentary life, incorporate physical activities into your daily routine. Even if it’s a short session of walking, stretching, or home workouts. It can be a powerful form of self-care. Physical activities do a lot more than keeping you fit, they also release endorphins that boost your mood and reduces stress.
4. Never negotiate your “alone time”
It may look like it’s unachievable, however, you must have “Me time”. Practice mindfulness techniques like meditation, deep breathing exercises, or journaling to manage stress. Go for a spa date, get a leave and go on trips as your budget affords you. Create the luxury rest you need no matter where you are currently in your life and finances.
5. Hydration:
Drink plenty of water throughout the day. Carry a water bottle to remind yourself to stay hydrated.
6. Set Boundaries
Setting boundaries is a fight for your focus. You don’t have to always say ” yes”, learn to say “no” when necessary and delegate tasks to avoid burnout.
7. Social Connections
Maintain relationships with family and friends. Schedule regular catch-ups or virtual meetings to stay connected. You need people who are dear to you to talk to, play with and be vulnerable with.
8. Regular Wellness Check ups
Schedule routine medical check-ups and prioritize your health needs. You need a dental check up, blood pressure, sugar level, heart rate, etc. Pay special attention to scheduling your health check ups. You want to make sure that this machine “your body” is fit to keep going and carrying you.
9. Do what matters to you
Attend that brunch date, start that NGO, write that book, give to that orphanage. Rediscover your hobbies and passion, they reignite your creative energy and bring you joy, whether it’s painting, drawing, reading, speaking, or gardening, get involved in activities that you love.
In addition, pay attention to caring for your spirit, soul and body.
• Care for your spirit by praying if you believe in it, or by making loud affirmations, reading books and listening to people who speak to you at your core.
• Care for your soul by reading books that challenge you to be a better woman, listen to podcasts at least 15 mins before you head out, journal, pick up books per month that challenges you, embrace peace and guard it jealously, avoid drama, and be intentional about the friendships that pour into your soul.
We all go through difficult times, traumatic experiences, loss of a loved one or even loss of an important relationship in our lives, forgive and heal from within, sometimes it’s difficult to pull through alone, you may need a therapist, invest in it and get better. You can come out of every challenge better than you entered it!
• Care for your body by eating right, watch out for your allergies, things that triggers wrong moods, and thoughts. Prioritize sleep and rest. Get a good skin care routine, care for your body, get a bubble bath and just relax your nerves. Book a massage session.. Get a good perfume and smell nice, wear clothes that fits your body shape and be confident about who you see each time you look into the mirror. That body has helped you go through different phases, so extend some grace and love back to it.
“We have so much coming in as sisters, when is our interior life ever put at the forefront? We constantly want to give to other people … Too much of not caring for yourself is not a good thing. We’re bad at that as achievers. Self-care is a priority and we have to do it more.”
– Ava DuVernay
You have to unlearn that mindset that says “self care is selfish”, you’re only anyone’s hero to the extent that you love and pour back to yourself. Self care is the way to tell yourself that you honor yourself and you want the world to experience the best version of you as a mother, care giver, wife and whatever shoes you may have on.
Self-care is a way of saying “I matter too”. When you take care of yourself, you are also better able to take care of those around.
